Counseling for Couples

If you’re part of a couple in distress, you may feel that there’s no way out of your troubled relationship. Here is how couples therapy can help you.

  1. Changes the views of the relationship. Throughout the therapeutic process, the therapist attempts to help both partners see the relationship in a more objective manner.  They learn to stop the “blame game” and instead look at what happens to them as a process involving each partner. Therapists begin this process by collecting “data” on the interaction between the partners by watching how they interact. Therapists then formulate “hypotheses” about what causal factors may be in play to lead to the way the couples interact. Different therapists will use different strategies, but if they focus on altering the way the relationship is understood, the couple can start to see each other, and their interactions, in more adaptive ways.
  2. Modifies dysfunctional behavior. Effective couple’s therapists attempt to change the way that the partners behave with each other. This means that in addition to helping them improve their interactions, therapists also need to ensure that their clients are not engaging in actions that can cause physical, psychological, or economic harm.
  3. Decreases emotional avoidance.  Couples who avoid expressing their private feelings put themselves at greater risk of becoming emotionally distant and grow apart. Effective couple’s therapists help their clients bring out the emotions and thoughts that they fear expressing to the other person. Couples therapy allows the partners to feel less afraid of expressing their needs for closeness.
  4. Improves communication. All effective couple’s therapies focus on helping the partners to communicate more effectively. Couples might require some coaching to learn how to speak to each other in more supportive and understanding ways.  The therapist may also provide the couple the with the basis for knowing what types of communication effective and what types will only cause more conflict.  They can learn how to listen and communicate more actively and empathetically.
  5. Promotes strengths. Effective couple’s therapists point out the strengths in the relationship and help build resilience. Because so much of couple’s therapy involves focusing on problem areas, it’s easy to lose sight of the other areas in which couple’s function effectively. The point of promoting strength is to help the couple derive more enjoyment out of their relationship.


7600 143rd Street
West Apple Valley, MN 55124

tmensink@live.com
(651) 373-9440

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